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Writer's pictureSami Bell

Find Your Happy Place

Updated: Dec 10, 2019

Find your happy place… Sure, that could be a tropical island but few of us can go there daily, so let’s focus a little more narrowly. Where is your happy place in your home?

zen conscious parenting in chaos

For some people, it’s not just a specific room but a specific feel. For me, I love being in my living room, in my comfy chair, legs curled up under me...but only when it’s tidy. When my couch is empty of kid toys and my new pretty throw pillows are placed in the corners, when the blanket I made is folded over the other chair, when the coffee table is clear and the rug is vacuumed, that’s when the world feels right. I can literally feel my energy mellow the more ordered my living room gets. Chaos can still be happening around me, but if my living room is in order, I feel like I can handle everything else. For my best friend, her happy place is her kitchen. The root of her happiness in her home lies in her kitchen being spotless and clear. She has a big beautiful kitchen so it really stands out when it’s all put back together the way she wants. It’s like a big sigh of relief and then she can tackle her life. So, my morning starts with making my bed. This tiny task makes me feel like “I can do it” - not sure what “it” is, but it doesn’t seem to matter, I feel capable and in charge. Then, the boys and I go down to my kitchen, (which I cleaned the night before), and it feels like I have options. Breakfast and coffee with smiles and hugs and stories about the dreams they had the night before. Then to my comfy chair in my living room to relax and enjoy the peace of a smooth morning and a delicious cup of joe. Things definitely haven’t always been this way. I used to wake up grumpy and dreading going downstairs to the tornado wreckage my kids had left over the previous days. It felt overwhelming to see so much … everywhere. Too overwhelming to even know where to start. And I contributed too, as I tossed random things onto each of my counters until the piles hid the marble itself. I told myself, “I hate cleaning.” But looking back, I actually think it was more, “I hate that I feel like I’ll never actually tackle this job because it’s so big.” A few weeks ago, something struck me and compelled me to start reorganizing my kitchen. It took 6 hours, and it’s a small kitchen. But I ended feeling great. The next day was the living room and bathroom. The next day was my room (and the 3 loads of clean laundry piled into the basket that never left the chest at the foot of my bed). Then my bathroom and the upstairs bathroom and the laundry room. Then the boys’ room. In a few days, I felt like I actually had a handle on my home. And it’s far from perfect, I’m no expert on any of these things but I have noticed some pretty important changes since organizing my home: 1) It’s easier to keep things tidy because everything has a home. I grab a box or bucket and anything that doesn’t belong in that room goes in the bucket to be sorted and returned to its proper home at another time. This lets one room get done and look and feel great without having to run up and down the stairs 37 times. 2) My kids play better. When they have empty space to play in they are more intentional and more creative. They get along better too and they give me some space to work! Plus they actually pick up their things (with help) because they know everything has a home.

Pro tip from Melissa Coffey at Serenity Now Organizing,”Don’t let your embarrassment lead to the typical, “UGH! Clean up this pigsty!’, instead try, ‘Let’s get these toys back to their homes.” It’s so much more peaceful and positive!

3) My husband is less stressed. We haven’t actually discussed it but I’m going to take an educated guess after 10 years of knowing this man’s brain that the reason he’s less stressed is that he feels like everything is under control here while he’s working and he can leave work to enjoy the family instead of being handed a chore list. (Don't worry, he helps plenty!)


4) I’m so much happier. I feel content, at peace, in my happy place. That leads to a much more patient mommy who actually wants to get on the floor and play a game because the floor isn’t sticky! And because I love how I feel, re-cleaning doesn’t feel bad, in fact, it feels like an act of service to my family and my home.


happy mother and sons
My boys in my comfy chair!

So, where in your home is your happy place and how does it need to feel to actually convey that happiness? Make it happen, make it a priority, even just one room can really change your outlook and start the domino effect in your favor!


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